day ten: am I just here for the food?

Large image of an ATM Photographed inside a Gi...
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Today was a day my disability was thrown into harsh and rather unforgiving relief, as was most of my family’s (this excludes my mother) general inattentiveness to this sound of my voice.  I am beginning to wonder why I’m here if the majority of my family seems to see my voice to the words I say as mere sound, background noise which requires very little attention at all.  Am I really a person to them or mouthing more then a reoccurring obligation, a duty to be discharged, a burden to be shouldered?  I feel as though my opinions are thought of as frivolous and inconsequential at best and downright stupid at worst.  If that is the case what purpose do I serve?  Am I nothing more than a glorified ATM machine to them?  Is my disability nothing more than a convenient reason for them to stay at home and not have to struggle through the economic sludge of this current recession nightmare?  Though I tend to give people the benefit of the doubt the longer this goes on the shorter my temper gets.  How I supposed to believe that I’m being treated like an adult when all my concerns are ignored and my frustration is treated as nothing more than a five-year olds temper tantrum?  The truth is that if I believed that I was being taken seriously at all, these “tantrums” would not exist because I wouldn’t feel the need to scream in order to get my point across.


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